3 Tips for Getting "Home" for the Holidays

Turkey in the fridge. Parents out shopping. First-year college students upstairs sleeping, getting ready to break up with their high school sweethearts while they're in town. The holiday season has begun.

At the heart of the holidays is the idea of going home. But where is home these days?

Like the promise of working at the same job for your whole career, the traditional notion of home has largely given way. Home means many things today, few of which resemble the programs we grew up watching on TV, with families like the Brady Bunch or the Cosbys.

So, in the days and weeks between now and New Years' Day, how do we approach going home? Where is home, and how do we get there?

Here are 3 tips for getting started.

1) Realize the storybook "home" was partially true, but for most people, plenty of fiction. It's easy to grieve for the home everyone else seems to have but we don't. But actually, few people ever did experience the "Home Sweet Home" version. I still wonder how the Brady's managed to pay the expenses for all those kids, including their helper Alice, dutifully available every day in her uniform in the kitchen. I don't think Carol Brady had a job, so Mike was one darn successful architect.

2) Realize "home" is a concept that evolves over time. A few days ago I landed at Schiphol airport in The Netherlands. As I got off the plane I thought to myself, "it's so good to be home." Only one year ago I wrote the following sentence in my book, describing my move here to live with my new Dutch husband: "I'd be stretching it to say that Amsterdam feels like 'home." If the safety and comfort of home feels far away to you now, have faith that this isn't a permanent state of affairs.

3) Realize "home" is a state of heart-and-mind as well as a physical place. Thinking home is a house in the place where you grew up overlooks how much we generate the sensation of "home" inside of ourselves. We can touch that experience of "home" even if that house has long since been sold. If all the people we loved in our first house have died. Or we never had a place we called home in the first place. If we're alone this holiday season, or we have excellent reasons not to go back to the dwelling of our youth, ever. Ultimately we are home when we know our place in the wider world, we know who we really are, and we know the purpose of our lives. In that sense, we can all go home, no matter where we are for the holidays.

Get your home sorted for a sale with the 12 tips of Christmas

our property is arguably your biggest financial asset – so when you come to sell it, there is an obvious desire to get the best possible price.

Some people may stall putting their home on the market until after Christmas, but some careful thought, affordable changes and spot of festive DIY may add value to your home as the decorations come down and the New Year approaches.

Research from the National Home Improvement Show earlier this autumn reveals that by spending less than £5,000, you can significantly boost the value of your home – which could include anything from re-decorating, de-cluttering and deep cleaning to adding new flooring or updating the bathroom or kitchen.

Su Snaith, head of estate agency at Harrison Murray and The Nottingham, said: There always seems to be so much going on in the run up to Christmas, and for many people, home improvements are the last thing on their mind.

“However, if you can find some time amidst all the preparations and shopping, planning and carrying out some fairly simple DIY and housekeeping tricks with minimum disruption may have the desired affect of adding value and put you ahead of the game when you come to market your property after Christmas.”

The 12 tips of Christmas:

Spruce up your paintwork with a fresh neutral look throughout, simple and effective.

Hire a carpet-cleaning machine for the weekend and give your carpets a deep cleansing shampoo.

Giving your kitchen a makeover doesn’t have to cost the earth - you can give it a new lease of life by replacing cupboard doors, drawer fronts and worktops. This is far cheaper than a complete kitchen overhaul.

Similarly, you can spruce up your bathroom cheaply if the sanitary-ware is left in the same position.

Replacing the grouting around sinks and baths will give an instant brighter and cleaner look.

Make sure the doorbell and smoke alarms are in good working order and replace the batteries if necessary – a small, but valid point.

DIY enthusiasts could sand original floorboards and either paint them or stain them; hiring a sander is not very expensive.

With windows, focus on replacing any broken panes and repairing the frames. Repaint them then add new draught seals to improve energy efficiency and reduce noise pollution.

Updating light fittings is pretty easy and may even give a whole new look to a room.

Don’t overlook the garage – statistics show that 55 per cent of us don’t use the garage to park the car in. Try and keep it tidy and store all items on shelves to give an impression of space rather than clutter.

It may not be typical gardening weather, but whatever the season it is important to show off your outdoor space. Make sure all tools and toys are packed away out of sight. A few colourful potted containers will help to cheer up the wintry outdoors.

Last but not least, be prepared when your agent arranges a viewing. Tidy up as best you can and get ready to show off your home to its true potential … and wait to that all-important offer!

Fulton home is meant for family

Six years ago, Victor and Margaret Kim purchased a 1-acre parcel in Fulton and proceeded to build a glamorous home with a serious purpose. Once it was completed, the couple took Margaret Kim's 96-year-old grandmother out of assisted living and into their home.

The grandmother lived with the Kims in their brand-new, completely handicapped-accessible home until her death the following year.

The total cost for the land and the custom-built 9,000-square-foot Colonial-style mansion came to $1.8 million. Outfitted for easy access from room to room and with an elevator opening onto three levels, it is a home the Kims plan to enjoy into their senior years.

Margaret Kim and her physician husband own and operate two Howard County locations of AllCare of Maryland Urgent Care Centers. The design scheme for their home, equipped with higher commodes, lower sinks and door handles, aimed for both style and function.

"Building an ADA [American Disability Act standards for Accessible Design] or Universal Design Compliant [UDC] luxury home fits my family's needs today and for years to come," said Margaret Kim, who has a 12-year-old daughter, Bridget, living at home, as well as grown children and grandchildren who come to visit. "Almost everyone who enters my home does not even realize [it is] a UDC home."

A sampling of universal design elements include wider hallways throughout the home, oak wood flooring, low-pile carpeting, a shower with a pull down bench, an intercom system in every room, windows designed to be wheelchair-height for ease of looking out and a telephone in the elevator.

However, first and foremost for Margaret Kim was the creation of warmth, elegance and balance throughout every part of the home's interior and exterior.

"I wanted to incorporate the feng shui elements of earth — family, kitchen, living room — by custom-painting beige, also using water elements of blue for the kitchen wall which helps evoke refreshing energy of color and calmness, incorporating wood elements which signify growth and finally, vitality by custom-painting the second-floor hallway with alternating brown stripes. [I] used fire to emphasize high energy by painting the lower-level wall[s] pink."

"I wanted to create an open design, flowing, UDC home that has an intimate, comfortable, lived-in feel about it but was formal and elegant with transitional pieces of furniture to bring the home together full circle at the mosaic in the foyer."

The swirling mosaic design of the tile has been inlaid in the marble floor of the foyer, adjacent to a cantilevered staircase to the second level. Margaret Kim also employed a painter to give the downstairs walls a marble appearance.

"My favorite room in the home is my kitchen," she continued. "I love spending time cooking, working at the ... kitchen table, looking out the window at my backyard deck patio and pool and also sitting on my deck under the pergola and sipping a cup of tea."

Both high-tech functional and thoroughly outfitted, the kitchen features a Viking range with front mounted controls and a lowered stovetop. Two stacking Fisher Paykel dishwasher drawers offer ease of loading and unloading the dishwasher from a wheelchair. A side-by-side Viking refrigerator features easy-to-access handles.

In her quest for brightness and joy, Margaret Kim has filled the six-bedroom, eight-bathroom home with 28 hanging Schonbek crystal chandeliers and a living room filled with Federal-style furniture. For the dining room, she purchased a triple-pedestal, 12-foot-long mahogany table.

"I also love my bedroom, as it has whitewashed antique Henredon furniture and beautiful whitewashed plank flooring that evokes the beach and is soothing and calming," she said.

The master bathroom has a steam shower, a Jacuzzi tub and heated marble floors.

Paintings and tapestries on the walls and Asian works of art enhance the decor. Set pieces rest on several tables alongside family photos and awards given to her daughter, a competitive swimmer.

The house also has a six-bay finished garage with access to an indoor hallway. The Kims use it to host fundraisers for charity and hold large family gatherings. Their hope is to continue doing so for many years to come.

"We have received over 15 unsolicited offers over the past two years to sell our home," Margaret Kim said, "even though these people have never seen the inside and they don't know that it is a UDC home."

Right at Home: Tips for a no-fuss Thanksgiving

Preparing a Thanksgiving feast ranks high on the entertaining stress-o-meter.

Expectations, traditions and a home full of guests can make even the most seasoned host lose sleep.

But don’t let the anticipatory list-making, house-fluffing and food preparing become more tiring than it needs to be. Some expert advice and helpful products can make Thanksgiving entertaining more stylish, fun and fret-free.

Kevin Sharkey, executive creative director at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, begins with a why-didn’t-I-think-of-that idea:

“If you have performance anxiety about the day, what if you (threw the party) the night before or after?

Sometimes I think the only reason to have Thanksgiving is to have sandwiches the next day. So have a great lunch or cocktail party instead,” he suggests.

Guests are just looking for a convivial atmosphere, so don’t bother with fancy appetizers.

As Sharkey points out, guests won’t remember the homemade potato chips you slaved over; they’ll remember the stressed-out you.

Serve simple things on interesting plates or in silver bowls, and it all looks special.

For example, West Elm has Shanna Murray’s gold-penned bisque stoneware salad plates. (www.westelm.com)

Instead of a complicated bar, come up with one fun drink to serve as a showpiece, then add a few bottles of wine and sparkling water.

If you’re doing a casual Thanksgiving meal or a lunch, consider setting out an interesting variety of craft beers, as well as vegetable juices and iced tea for the non-drinkers.

Better Homes and Gardens has suggestions for make-ahead nibblers such as mini gruyere puffs that can be made a month ahead and frozen, or mini meatballs in a tangy apricot sauce that can be re-warmed in a slow cooker during cocktail hour. (www.bhg.com)

At Realsimple.com, you’ll find lots of make-ahead appetizers, salads, sides, breads and desserts for Thanksgiving.

If you do plan to host on Thanksgiving day, keep the menu simple.

“No one wants 14 different things. And don’t be ashamed to get certain things from a store, or to ask people to bring something,” Sharkey says.

Oma Ford, executive editor at Better Homes & Gardens magazine, says she’s not usually a potluck fan “but it’s actually a wonderful way to approach the Thanksgiving feast. We often spend the holiday with friends who usually make the turkey and desserts and then ask all their guests to bring a side dish they couldn’t live without.

The sides are really the fun, interesting part of the meal, and with this approach none of the guests feels like they missed out on a favorite or traditional element of the feast.”

Does a friend make awesome mashed potatoes? Is a relative the pie person? Do you have a nearby market that makes yummy stuffing? Ask, order and lessen your workload.